While shopping this weekend, I was faced with the horrifying reality that, once again, I have gone up a size. Poo! Crap! Dang It! Errr! !@#$! Why does this continue to happen! I remember long ago... long, long, long ago... I would think "Oh, being a size 2 isnt so bad. It's not a size 0, but at least its not a size 6! GASP!" Then it was, "Size 4 aint so bad.... at least I'm not a size 8!" And now.... all that's just hogwash! I honestly never thought I'd see this day. Always told myself I'd never let this happen. But the truth is ... it did. Despite my often wavering exercise and healthy eating efforts - its already happened, done, finished.... crap! :(
*Sigh......
So, watching Kendra last night, I suddenly became infuriated! Kendra, the ex Playboy model/ex girlfriend to Hugh Hefner/now wife of Hank Baskett/really annoying laugher, had a baby and guess what... she doesnt look like a Playboy model immediately after the baby is born! Gee, how mind-boggling! Sike! She's on TV complaining/moping/crying about her weight and insecurities... and all I could think was "Well! Good! We dont all get to be Playboy models and head-turning beautiful for our entire lives (minus a few months of baby-weight), so shut up and think about what all us fat girls feel like! Errrr!"
I know... that was bad, huh? How can one well-fed girl be so hostile? ...No clue! I too just happened to have been feeling very insecure and disgusted with myself much like I assume Kendra was (although she had a baby... and all I have is a belly). Doesnt it stink?! ...Told ya it was bad news!
Well, I'm off to hit the gym although after a day of McDonalds for - yes - breakfast AND lunch, I'm not sure cardio all night long would put a dent in the calories I've consumed today.
*Sigh......
Tomorrow's always another day. Here's to a healthier, more active Tuesday!
Oh, and that reminds me! If you cant quite remember how Kendra has ALWAYS looked, here's some eye-candy for you! And DONT punch your computer/smear chocolate all over her face/or give her a permanent marker mustache .... you're only hurting yourself. *Sigh......
